Batman The Dark Knight Rises

This scene is absolutely and positively one of my favorites in the whole of the Batman series.

It features two of my most favorite actors of all time, particularly Michael Keaton who is my MOST favorite actor of all time. Michelle Pfeiffer of course is the epitome of Hollywood glamor and ability as well, and a whole generation of guys including myself who grew up with her setting the standard for Selina Kyle, the CatWoman – an attractive yet highly troubled woman with deep issues that almost compare to those of Batman.

As we all know now, Anne Hathaway’s Catwoman initially believes in main protagonist Bane’s goal of bringing power ‘back to the people’ whilst maintaining her own selfish interest, in that she wishes her lengthy record to be swiped clean (or something like that I hope).

Michelle Pfeiffer’s Catwoman issues were with her boss, played by Christopher Walken (and yes I know its hard not to read the rest of this blogpost in a Chris Walken accent but please try). Anyway, her Catwoman character was torn between wanting to kill Walken or not to, and we watch as her schizophrenia slowly but surely gets the best of her. In the tragic ending, she dies while finally killing him. Or does she? (the latter part of the credits show a Catwoman like figure on a rooftop).

So you may wonder why the hell I’m going on about Catwoman. The answer is because is I honestly think that pursuing her story and relationship with Batman would make the awesomest Batman movie ever.

Which is to say a few things. a.) I think Batman The Dark Knight Rises isn’t all that great. I give it an overall 7/10. and b.) I have a thing with hot women in skintight leather suits, (and who the hell doesn’t).

Why isn’t TDKR very good? Well it’s too loud, long, and I couldn’t understand 80% of what anyone, especially Bane was saying. Christian Bale, who is a brilliant actor, still sounds silly carrying on that weird voice when dressed as Batman. If he can’t carry it no one can.

The rest of the movie is a hundred confusing scenes rushing one after the other, making you have to concentrate while thinking things like ‘Man, the years haven’t been good to Matthew Modine.‘, ‘I need to look up who’s playing Bane as soon as I get online (turns out it was Tom Hardy)‘, ‘Michael Caine looks awful in his crying scene‘, and ‘That fat cop sure doesn’t look like he’s lost any weight living underground for three months‘.

Sure it has its moments. I like the ‘Big guy is comin’ to getcha.’ vibe when Batman lit up the bridge with his trademark logo (that must’ve taken a day to set up. And all just for effect. Batman is one dedicated dude.) I like the Bat and the overall wintry, sad and desolate feel of the movie, with its grey and blue undertones. It really does look like Gotham the way we envisioned it.

But the biggest thing in this movie has to be Catwoman. And that wouldn’t have happened if she hadn’t kissed him near the end. If she didn’t, then she would’ve been just another character in the series. But she did, and when she did I was reminded of that whole scene above with Pfeiffer and Keaton where sparks were literally exploding between the two.

The plot would be too hard to ignore. Heart made of stone hero meets the ultimate femme fatale, someone just as adept as he who also has the ability to disappear while in mid conversation, but is clearly on her way to self destruction. Immediately attracted via their common issues, he is forced to put himself in danger, or worse, reveal his true emotions to try and save her from herself.

The story would write itself. It’s a freaking goldmine waiting to happen both financially and story – wise. I think the idea is so good that if the producers of the next Batman would read this and challenge me to do it, I would. In a heartbeat.

TDKA is an ok attempt but is hardly an improvement on the Heath Ledger movie, and is surely forgettable except for Anne Hathaway. That’s the only way I see the next one getting more interesting.

2 thoughts on “Batman The Dark Knight Rises

  1. I do agree that TDKR was mediocre. I was alright with the voices of Bane of Batman. The plot is actually what did it for me. Villain has a bomb, the hero has to put his life on the line to destroy the bomb and save the city. The plots been done too many times before.

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